3 positive affirmations you deserve to hear

Hey boos,

I am now officially on Summer break! You know what that means, I can actually pay attention to things! (YEEAAAA BOIIIII!)

So this week hasn’t been the easiest of weeks mentally, it’s not been bad but it’s not been great either and sometimes, actually very often, I watch ASMR to help me sleep (and it really helps me, some people think its really creepy but like get that negativity away from me, thank u x) anyway, at the end of this specific video, the youtuber said something along the lines of “You are loved, you are strong and I am proud of you.” and that really gave me comfort and joy. I think in this time, a lot of us still have exams, a lot of us are graduating, summer is coming and a lot of us don’t really know what we are going to be doing, we could all do with some positive affirmations. The bible has so many, like God’s word just encourages me so much and gives me so much comfort, it’s great.

  1. You are loved.

Romans 8; 37-39, possibly one of my favourite verses says “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

I love this passage so much because sometimes you think, how can God ever love someone like me? or you think that you’ve made him so angry and he doesn’t love you anymore, you think now that he’s seen how filthy my heart is, he wants nothing to do with me. This passage always comforts, and is like nah, there is nothing in creation that can separate us from God’s love, that can stop God from loving us, no matter how grimy and dirty you are, your heart is, how disobedient and stubborn your spirit is, God still loves you and you can’t stop that. It’s insane to think that even when you feel like no one in this universe loves you or cares for you, the creator of everything in this universe and more loves you. (happy reacts only) 

Not only has God loved you, he has also given you people that love you. “No one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age; homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields -along with persecutions-and in the age to come eternal life” -Mark 10; 29-30

God has given us so many Christian brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers that love us and are there for us*****, it truly is amazing. You have so many people in Christ that support you and love you and want the best for you. (I also put the rest of the verse because I wanted us all to see that Christianity is not all sunshine and rainbows but like its fine, our strength is in God)

2. There will be hard, trying times but the hard times don’t last.

Sometimes when you’re in a hard situation, in a rut, it’s just so hard to see the end of it. You feel like you might never leave there and just the thought of that is almost too hard to bear. Have no fear, you won’t be there forever.

“This is what the Lord Almighty says: “The fasts of fourth, fifth, seventh and tenth months will become joyful and glad occasions and happy festivals for Judah. Therefore love truth and peace” Zechariah 8;19. From my understanding, those fasts and times were times of mourning for Judah but God put an end to those fasts of mourning and turned them into glad and happy occasions, much like whatever it is you might be going through in this time. These days of sadness for you will be turned into days of joy and happiness, by God; in Jesus’s name, Amen.

“In that day I will restore the fallen house of David. I will repair its damaged walls. From the ruins I will rebuild it and restore its former glory” Amos 9;11****

God is will rebuild you from the ground up and restore whatever it is you think you might have lost. I can honestly say, it’s going to be fine. (..that is, if you let God come into your life and do the work that needs to be done in you to restore you and be pruned, you can’t grow and be better if you don’t let yourself get pruned)

3.  You’re not weak for asking for help.

So my friends and I were taking our love languages test the other day (well I was forcing everyone to take it, but that’s a different story) and the least love language sign for me was acts of service, which is like when someone helps you out. No surprise because I have always felt bad asking for help, I feel like when I ask for help, I am weak, that’s just my human pride speaking and not letting me get better and I need to work on it.

Accepting help does not make you weak at all. 

In fact Matthew 10: 9-11, Jesus urges his disciples to accept help from others.

“Do not get any gold or silver or copper to take with you in your belts- no bag for the journey or extra shirt or sandal of staff, for the worker is worth his keep. Whatever town or village you enter, search for some worthy person and stay at their house until you leave.”

There is no shame in asking for help when you need it, sometimes you need that extra support and that’s fine, that’s what the rest of us are here for.

In 2 Corinthians 1: 3-4, it says “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ……….who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” God has helped us and we are here to help you with the help God has given us, it’s all good darling.

So those are the 3 positive affirmations, I think this is very important and I will be posting more on my blog as the Lord continues to reveal more to me. I plan on making another blog post on how the Word of God has comforted and confronted the beliefs I had about myself and I’m excited to put that up, should be good.

I hope we are all enjoying the lovely sun? (It’s so sunny in Edinburgh right now, I am absolutely THRIVING, Golden hour is literally the best time of my day)

Anyway, have a blessed weekend.

Lots of love,

Gedo xx

 

*****Also I am aware that not everyone is currently surrounded by people that truly mean and want the best for them and that’s sad because God obviously want us to have that comfort and I think church is a really good place to get that so I’d say a good first step is to get plugged in to a good church where you’re fed and loved (even if you aren’t a christian, I find a lot of joy and comfort and love just being at church, you can go on your own or ask your local friendly neighbourhood christian friend)  and of course, I’m always down to listen to anyone that needs a-listening.

****** That’s the version in my personal bible, the NIV says “I will restore David’s fallen shelter- I will repair its broken walls and restore its ruins- and will rebuild it as it used to be, so that they may possess the remnant of Edom and all the nations that bear my name”

two.

Nestle had always been a “too” since she was a baby.

She was always too much

or too little.

She was either too small or too big

She was too strong, too rough, too passionate, she had too many edges, she asked too many questions.

Tetley had always been a “to”

He was always in the background.

He was never the subject or the object but simply took his position between them.

In his last year of high school, his 4th girlfriend (he’d had one for every year)  had had a conversation with him he had tried to forget, she was trying to break up with him and he was trying to understand why.

“This isn’t about me is it?” he asked, referring to the breakup

“That’s the problem T, this isn’t about you, it’s NEVER about you! It’s always about me, it’s always “how’s YOUR day” or “what do YOU want to do” or “okay if YOU want” It’s like your life does not exist without me, it’s like YOU don’t exist without me, without someone, like you can never be alone because then there is nothing about you. Tell me, have you ever said or done anything that wasn’t completely influenced by someone else?”

And that’s exactly what had brought him to the dodgiest centre he had ever had the displeasure of seeing. 1/2 of the neon letters in its sign had stopped working so instead of being “Bobby’s pleasure centre”, it  looked  like “Bby’s ere entr”, it looked a bit ominous if T was being honest and the thought of going home had crossed his mind but he swatted it away.

His ex girlfriend’s words had stayed with him even though he was in his third year of University now, he had seen the advertisement for this free ballroom dancing class on gumtree and the conversation he  had with her came flooding back to him because he  once told her it was something he’d like to do, but she said it was too cringey so he didn’t. He signed up without much thought, that would show her, also the girl he was currently talking to said she really liked boys who did “out of character” things, joining the rugby team at his University was most certainly not an option as his somewhat skinny frame would break if any of the athletic rugby lads so much as looked at him and atleast if he embarrassed himself here, no one would know about it.

She had noticed him first.

He wasn’t exceptionally good looking but Nestle liked that, she didn’t like boys that were goodlooking, she always found them somewhat inauthentic, he had a boyish features and ginger hair, features that she wouldn’t normally find attractive but he worked with them well.

Nestle was certain she had found the love of her life or maybe it’s the dim lighting and the adrenaline from the fact that there is atleast one cute guy here, she smiled at the thought.

Well I hope he doesn’t wear that shirt at our wedding, Nestle laughed silently and rolled her eyes at the thought. I’m so annoying. 

T scanned the room, there was a comfortable amount of people, comfortable in that it wasn’t cramped enough to feel claustrophobic but not too few to feel self conscious. There was a good mix of guys and women but it seemed as though most were either couples or  friends, everyone seemed to know each other. His eyes stopped at a girl who seemed to be a bit farther away from the crowd, she was a black girl with cool dark blue braids in, T had had enough black friends to know that that probably wasn’t her real hair and to know that commenting on it was probably not the best conversation starter, except maybe if it was a compliment but then she’d probably have heard that a lot. He still thought it was cool though.

She was smiling and maybe it was the lighting but she had a beautiful smile.

The instructor called for everyone to gather in a circle, possibly introduce himself and give some instructions, T wasn’t  paying attention.

His eyes looked for hers again.

She was standing right underneath the light this time, directly opposite him. Her eyes were gleaming and she tilted her neck slightly, she stared at the instructor in deep concentration, she was quite cute. His eyes moved downwards, she was wearing a black turtle neck and mid length tartan skirt. He looked down at his own choice of attire, a purple and white plaid shirt and jeans, his favourite.

T was never one to shy away from conversation or from people, he liked talking, he liked making jokes, he liked being around people, it made him feel cool, for lack of better word and  under normal circumstances, he would just stroll to her and ask her if she’d be his partner but she made him nervous, like she might look at him and see his whole life and not be interested.

The instructor was now calling for everyone to find partners and everyone was looking to each other, she had moved away from the light.

Waiting.

Waiting to be chosen, she sighed and looked around, she couldn’t understand why people never chose her, why she was always left on the sidelines. She looked at the cute guy who was currently staring at another girl, this always happened to her, she was never going to be chosen.

He wasn’t sure what to do but he knew he didn’t really have much time to think, it was either now or never. His legs started first and before he knew he was right in front of her,  he had walked up to her and she couldn’t believe it, she was smiling again, this time with teeth and she was beautiful.

And she was still beautiful when he placed his arm, in the most cutest awkward way she had ever seen, around her waist.

And gosh, was she beautiful when he spun her, because her skirt spun too and she laughed and if this was a ball, she would definitely be the belle.

“So what’s your name?” she asked in the break, her eyes soft but like fire at the same time, piercing, daring almost.

“Well people call me T,” he responded hoping she wouldn’t ask him his full name “What’s yours?”

“Surely, it must come from something,” she laughed “What’s your full name?” she sounded like she actually cared about what he had to say, she looked like she wanted to know everything about him.

“Promise you won’t laugh, I hate my name, like I feel like my parents were having a laugh when they named me.” He said smiling, she laughed, he had such a lovely smile and his voice was nothing like anything she thought she would be attracted to but she loved it, she would have never thought that an Irish accent could  be remotely sexy, especially after how many times she had heard it.

“Let’s hear it then.”

“My full name is Tetley,” she couldn’t help laughing at the coincidence, it was just too humorous.

“I told you not to laugh!” he said like a child, which only made her laugh harder. he had an amused expression on his face which made her crush for him intensify and his eyes, his eyes were so piercing, they made her feel like a girl and a woman at the same time.

“No! No!” she said in between giggles “It’s not that, it’s just..” she said

“Just what?” he asked, crossing his arms again like a defensive child.

“My name is Nestle.” He couldn’t contain it himself either and laughed

“Are you serious?” He said through chuckles

“I guess our parents really enjoyed breakfast beverages.”

The conversation rolled on for the rest of the night. She called him Tea and he in return called her Mocha, because that was her favourite coffee. He went to the University of Edinburgh and she went to Heriot Watt, she gave him the facts about why Heriot Watt was superior, he didn’t agree. They both agreed One Direction was the best thing that happened to them  however he was very “After Zayn” and she was “Before Zayn”.

She was different, she had responses.

He listened.

She was fast with her remarks.

He asked questions.

She understood all his references.

He knew his memes.

She even had ones he did not recognise.

There were so many things she could tag him in.

She was funny.

He laughed at her jokes.

She was energetic.

He was grounded.

She was eager.

He was calm.

She asked questions.

He didn’t make her feel like a nuisance.

She was passionate.

He understood.

She was strong.

He was strong.

Even though she was little, her personality was big and she wasn’t afraid.

Even though he was big, he didn’t make her feel little.

She was honest.

He was kind.

She made him feel like he was the most interesting person in the world, he actually started believing he might be.

He made her feel just enough.

 

The class ended too quickly.

She wasn’t ready to go home yet, he had to make her stay.

He had to.

“Anywhere I can take you to?” He asked, grinning.

“Well, I guess I’m not too tired.” She responded.

And so they left together, to find a place for two.

 

How to achieve/set goals in 2019

Hey boos,

Yay! Here we are in 2019, Happy new year! We all made it and I am proud of every single one of us, glad we all made it safe. I’d like to say a special welcome to all those that joined us in 2018, I’m glad you’re here and I’m excited to see where we will all go this year!

Today, the first Wednesday of the year, I would like to give you 5 helpful tips on how you can set and achieve your goals in 2019!

Let’s get right into it.

1. Be diligent

I don’t think a lot of people pay a lot of care when they make their goals, I think they just think of things they would like and then write that down.

People sometimes write their goals without any intention of actually following through with them so they don’t spend a lot of time properly thinking about what they actually want to achieve.

My tip is to take time and think about what you want to achieve, what do you actually really want to achieve? is it realistic? is it a continuous goal or is something you can complete during the course of this year? What aspects of your life do you want to see change? How many aspects of your life would you like to work on this year compared to last year? How do you intend on carrying out these goals?

2. Less is more.

The few goals you have, the more diligently you can work on them. Think about all the aspects in your life you would like to work on and have a few goals for each. For example, I have categorised my goals in 6 sections, faith, health, appearance, inner self, business and academic and in each section I have an average of 2 goals (apart from my faith goals where I have 4).  This way when I look at my goals, I don’t feel overwhelmed and having few gives me the ability to make in depth plans on how to achieve them.

3. Be Measurable.

Let your goals be measurable, because this way at the end of the year when you look back to see how you did, you can have tangible results. For example, under my business goals, I have the goal to reach 500 followers on my blog and this is measurable because at the end of the year, I can look at my blog followers and see how well I did. Under academics, for another example, I have the goal to study an hour everyday separate to the time I spend doing coursework. This is different from saying “at the end of the year, I want to study more” because I could study for one second more and call that an achievement and it’s also not very accountable because at any given day I could study for 5 minutes and tell myself I’m accomplishing my goal but 5 minutes won’t really make any difference (to me personally) in what I’ve learnt.

4. Put your goals everywhere.

Put your goals everywhere and I mean it, everywhere. It’s very easy to forget things in the world we live in, there is so much information floating around catching our attention that we forget things so easily. It’s very easy to write the goals and then put them in a journal that you’re never going to open until the end of the year. Write these goals and put them in places you look at often (your mirrors, your refrigerator, maybe as your wallpaper on your phone, at your desk) put it everywhere and even if you do get desensitised to it and you dont notice yourself reading it, it is still in your brain subconsciously.

5. Switch up the wording. 

If you are moving some of your goals from last year into this year, I would suggest that you change the wording or add something to it to make it interesting and new. You don’t want to start of the year bored of your goals is essentially what I am trying to say.

If your goal for the last ten years has been to lose tummy fat, switch up the words, you could for example do your research as to what types of food  increases fat building around your stomach and set yourself a challenge to stay away from those foods.(I am not saying that you should quit eating bread or dairy or whatever it is, as I’m not a dietitian I can’t make those claims), what I am saying is, do your research and set a challenge for yourself. You might not quit anything but instead decide to do a workout catered to abs and weight loss a certain amount of times per week, I don’t know, that’s at your discretion.

Those are my tips for goals and I hope that this really helps everyone achieve their goals this year! Let me know what some of your goals are and how you plan on achieving them. Don’t forget to like, comment and follow and come back next week Wednesday for another post!

Have a blessed day,

Lots of love,

Gedo xx

I finally did it

I am buzzing lads.

I don’t even have time for my usual greeting, I am way too excited for that.

Y’all notice anything different though?

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Anything?

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ANYTHING AT ALL?

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WE HAVE A DOMAIINNNNNN

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I know! I KNOW! 

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I can’t believe that I’ve actually done it guys, like ugh join me in thanking God. I didn’t even think I was going to do it today! It’s currently 2:40 AM and I’m sat in this cute little nook I made for myself, sniffling in my satin pyjamas and I need to go to bed so I’ll finish this blog post off tomorrow but I just wanted to say that God did it.

On October 27th, 2:30 AM in the morning, Gedo made her very first investment towards her blog. On this day, she went from .wordpress.com to just .com. SHOOKETH.

Okay bed time now.

Hey boos,

So it’s a reasonable time now and I’m finishing up this post, still sniffling in my satin pyjamas. I just wanted to say that this is feels like a big milestone, just a couple weeks ago I finally hit  100 followers (currently on 112 now) and it feels like things are coming together.

I know this post is extremely jumbled up and definitely not a”perfect” post but honestly not all posts will be. I am far from being the “perfect” “put together” human being that people on social media love to be, and honestly I don’t know if I ever want my posts to be all perfect and fancy and put together and lacking personality, do you know what I mean?

My blog posts are me and when people read them I want the experience to feel like a conversation with their best friend, I want people to feel like they are getting a bit of me,  and I want them to feel like “oh well she doesn’t seem perfect and she’s doing it, so maybe I can too”.

Anyway, I am going way off topic but I guess what I’m trying to say is, even though this blog will continue to improve and get cuter and bigger, I’m going to try really hard to make sure it stays sincere, honest and raw.

So yea, cheers to .com.

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Have a blessed day,

Lots of love,

Gedo xx

to all the girls that yet to fall

This one is straight from my journal and I feel like since we are all friends here I can share, and I know this does not pertain to ALL the guys in the world and all of that, but yea I wont continue to explain myself so I don’t ruin the magic for you.
So enjoy, this is “to all the girls that are yet to fall”

My dearest love,
Darling child
You will be lost but you will find yourself again
so tuck your hair behind your ear and be strong.

The first boy will be…..a boy
He will know the right words to say
and kiss you softly on the lips
He will leave a warm smile on your face
and make you feel like the only girl
but you are not.
and the reason he has all the right words is because he has practiced them
time
and
time
again.

The second boy will be quiet
He is shrouded in mystery
and he never answers questions directly
He doesn’t talk                                  much
Yet he has mastered the language of the eyes
He will tell you he wants you
and needs you
and loves you
all without speaking

He will make you feel like words are useless
but you will soon come to realise the repetition in his language
and you will begin to wonder if his mystery is just another word for nothing.

The third boy will be your favourite boy.
He is everyone’s favourite.
He will make you laugh till you bend
With him, everything is new, everything is bright, everything is an adventure.
With him all sorrows are forgotten and all worries are lost.
But soon the jokes will no longer be funny
and you’ll try to find something concrete
Something you can grasp on to but it’ll all be dust
as things that are forgotten can be remembered and things that are lost can always be found.

Now the fourth boy, you’ll know to run away from yet he will draw you like a LIGHT attracts a MOTH.
He will smell of smoke, risk and expensive perfume
It will scare you but it will be so exhilarating.
He will paint pictures of Paris, London, Milan to you and drink the most expensive champagne to your name
You will argue.

At first, it’ll be one of the things you love about him but then it’ll become all that you do.

Soon Paris will no longer be as beautiful and la vie en rose will be a sad, sad song.

The last boy.
The one right under your nose.
You will ask him how his day was and he will tell you.
He will cuddle you and ask you if you got home safe.
He will kiss the tears of your eyelids and hold your hand as you rant to him about how bad your day was.
It will be so easy and you won’t know what to do because you’ve always been on fight mode
You’ve always been on try hard mode

Ride or die mode
Ride until it dies mode
and it always dies mode.
It might not be explosive.
glittery.
and blinding.

but he will be good to you.
and that will be just fine.

I WALKED 20 KM

Hey boos!

How are you all doing? I feel like it’s been a while since I last talked to you, the last upload was an updates blog and I said I would start posting on Mondays and Fridays, that’s starting this week, my creative juices are flowing (it might just be the glass of shloer sat next to me) and I have some great ideas for blogs so keep your eyes peeled.

Anyway, yes, I’m sure you’re wondering….20 km? what? is this clickbait? what are you doing Gedo? I can assure you, this is not clickbait and I did walk 20 km, let’s talk.

What did I do?

I walked 20 km, I left the house at about 6:20 am and returned at about 10 am.

Why did I do it?

I watched a video once on facebook, it was about a girl and she was crying and praying for  the people on the outside world to come to their aid and it really hit me how people like her were suffering, praying that people in other parts of the world would help her whilst I was sitting on my screen doing nothing. I imagined myself in her position and the thought plagued me for a while but I forgot about it under the guise of “I’m thinking about what to do”. Summer came around and the thought crept back, I kept trying to push it away telling myself there was nothing I could do. About a month ago, I finally got up and told myself I was going to do something, I had to do something. So I did.

How did I do it?

I thought about all the things I could possibly do to fundraise and eventually picked walking because I remembered walking 11 km back when I was in middle school to raise money for children (everyone in my class had to do it). I figured since I had already done 11 km, I would 1 up myself and do 20.

I googled how long it would take to walk it and went back and forth before deciding on 20 km. When that had been decided, I downloaded the “map my run” app on my phone and began practicing. Some days I walked 5 km, some days I did 10 km and one time, the week before the day of the walk, I did 12 km.

How did I feel?

I felt very nervous a week before it, I was dreading it a little bit because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to complete it or that something would go terribly wrong. Not to mention, the night before the day of the walk, I had terrible leg pains on both my legs but I was determined not to let it stop me. I prayed to God to heal my legs, I swallowed 2 ibuprofen tablets and went back to bed and when I woke up 3 hours later, my legs felt as good as new.

How did I feel on the walk?

At first it wasn’t too bad, I bought new running shoes the previous day and they caused my feet to hurt but I was determined not to let that hinder me. After the first 10 km, I  really started to feel it, at 15 km I wanted to cry and was regretting everything. At 18 km, I was limping and singing worship songs because that gave me the energy I needed and distracted me from the fact that I just wanted everything to end. at 20 km, I couldn’t believe I had done it and praised God for everything.

How did I feel after the walk?

I had been praying before the walk that I would feel NO pain in my legs afterwards and I didn’t feel any pain in my legs so God answered my prayers BUT I had chafed badly as you can imagine AND because of my shoes, the heels of my feet as well as the bottom of my toes hurt but I was just glad that I had accomplished it, I said I was going to do something and followed through and did it!

How much did I fundraise?

I fundraised 200 pounds, with the help of my family, my friends and my family’s friends! The link is here if you’re interested in donating.

Would I do it again?

Yes! I plan to some time in the future.

So what now?

RECOVERY SIS RECOVERY!

 

Thank you to everyone who helped with this, whether it was donating money, sharing it with their friends and family or even just educating themselves more on what was happening in Syria. I also want to thank God because he really helped me on this journey more than people will ever know. I also recorded my entire experience, I’m about to edit it so when the video goes live I will place the link here so you can watch it if you want.

Thanks for reading!

Leave a comment if you like.

Have a blessed weekend,

Lots of love,

Gedo xx

a poem to myself

I wrote this poem for a character I was playing in my drama society, but I quite like so I’ve decided to share it. The name of the character was gold by the way, and she was exactly like how this poem sounds.
The click clack of my heels the resounding anthem of my country
Population:
one confident boss woman.
My eyes burn forward steely and hot
I do not look down and
no one dares stare me in the eye
for fear the heat transcending my body in waves
does
not
burn
them
alive.
A walking hurricane
My fingers lie ironically lackadaisically beside me
fully aware of their ability to turn
anything
into
flames.
chipped nails and scaly.
they are the finest pieces of art if you ever saw one.
the story of the woman who was not afraid of
the
dirt
the woman who cried and did not wipe the tears away.
cried? hah. pay attention.
Lips.
Sharp and biting yet warm and sweet as honey
Who dareth stick their hand in the bees nest?
Ungraceful and chaotic.
Sharp.
Strong.
And so refreshing.
Loud and frightful.
Thunder.
You have been warned.
If you liked it, please do not forget to follow, like and comment and follow me on all my social media (keep scrolling down to find the links)
Have a blessed day,
Lots of love,
Gedo xx