Why the CU keep offering you free toasties. -An Atheists’ guide to Christian friends.

Hey boos,

This blog post is for my non-christian friends all over the globe who have christian friends and don’t understand what’s going on with them half the time, don’t worry I’ve got you.

So you’ve got one of these pesky Christians haven’t you? Always sharing something Jesus related on your feed amongst your memes, constantly inviting you for free food with subtle connotations of God chat, and let’s not even get started on the controversial beliefs that you both know they have but both pretend aren’t there. Also, what’s with this glow that they always have? Even. When. They. Are. Sad. Now that the ball is rolling, how on earth do they believe we were created? Helloooo, Evolution.

My name is Gedo Yamusa, your friendly online Christian and I’m here to give you some inside scoops on the thoughts going on in the head of your in-house friendly neighbourhood Christian. 

First of all, just like the whole “one size fits all” trend came and died because we realised, quite quickly, that not one size actually fits all, there is no “one size fits all” for Christians eithe.We come in all different shapes and sizes, all with different personalities and even beliefs. Some of us are baby Christians, some of us have been Christians since we came out of the womb, some of us were Christians and then we weren’t and now we’re Christians, some of us (wait for it..) aren’t even Christians yet (You’ll get there, I see you, right there at the back, don’t be shy, Jesus is knocking, you best open that door). You’ll probably meet many different Christians and they might not have the same ideas as the one outlined in this post and that’s okay, feel free to ask them questions on things they do that you don’t understand, they’ll probably be more than happy to explain it to you!

So why do Christians keep talking about God all the time? Are they trying to shove it down people’s throats?

Well, here’s one thing you must understand about the Christian. Take away God out of the Christian, and the Christian is nothing.

God is their life.

That might sound scary to you because well, as far as you know, your life is your own and you can’t imagine something else being your life. However the Christian understands and accepts that God has blessed them with this life, it’s a gift, but it’s also a gift that they cannot control and a gift they can’t take care of themselves, for example when a parent gives a young child a puppy as a present, the child cant control that puppy and most of the time it’s the parent that ends up taking care of the puppy.

(Where was I going with this?)

Yes, why do Christians talk about God all the time. Frankly, because they understand that without God, they wouldn’t be where they were. They would be way worse off and they probably were before they accepted God into their life. If you had your life changed wouldn’t you be shouting it from the rooftops? Wouldn’t you want your friends in on it too? It’s free, it’s got a lifetime warranty with the added bonus of Heaven for eternity.

And now you’re thinking, yea but Gedo, all that stuff doesn’t exist. This God stuff, it’s not real. You guys have just made it up cause it sounds nice and easy.

Well that’s going into real deep territory bud, I think that’d be a great conversation to have with your Christian. My explanation might not make sense to you but I’ll give it a shot. I know that God is real for 2 main reasons.

a. I know how I was before and how I am now, none of that could have been me. There is no way, something absolutely external had to have come into my heart and changed me because I could not have done it.

b. I look at the everyday miracles around; I’m really drawn to nature, I look at the skies, the trees, the mountains and I just can’t accept that that wasn’t made by God.

I know these aren’t as “scientific” or “evidence-filled” as you would probably like but many really smart people have written really smart books about this and I know a bunch of Christians that have read these books and for themselves compared the evidence for God’s existence and for God’s not existing, and well, they’re Christians now aren’t they?

Lemme let you in a little secret as well; being a Christian is not easy and it doesn’t feel nice all the time. Actually it’s kinda difficult sometimes. The world essentially hates you, people always questioning you and your beliefs and making you the enemy, I mean men in the Bible (which is a genuine historical account) died for this and Christians are still dying for this.

It’s not easy.

Yet we have a God who gives us the things we need to help us with these issues.

And now you’re saying, but you just said being a Christian was good.

Yea well, easy doesn’t mean good now does it? neither does good mean easy.

So we keep talking away about God because he’s the best thing that has ever happened to us and we want you to get on that. We invite you to all these things not because we want to force you into the church. We genuinely want you to just come along and see what’s up, obviously we want you to experience God for yourself but we aren’t going to hate you if you don’t. We are honestly extremely excited if we get so much as a “That was actually fun”. We’re just as stressed about this whole thing as you are, do you know how much Godly boldness and courage it took us to ask you in the first place? Don’t let that confident smile fool you, We’ve been thinking about this for a while.

If your Christian friend invites you to church next time, please don’t freak out. 9/10 it’s not as solemn and silent as you remember it to be, no one is going to look at you weirdly because you aren’t singing, no one expects you to pray, no one is going to judge you for not knowing where the chapter everyone is flipping to is (I don’t even know that) If you don’t want to go, decline. They’ll probably keep asking so go when you feel comfortable enough to and if you do want to go and they haven’t asked you yet, just ask them, they’re probably just scared. Remember also, just like clothes and Christians, Churches aren’t one size fits all, different churches have different personalities so just because you went to a really boring one when you were little, doesn’t mean you’ll have that same experience again.

The God chat? Just go with it, they just want to know where you’re at. Be honest but don’t be rude or disrespectful and I’m sure they will endeavour to do the same. Feel free to agree to disagree but let’s not stoop to name calling okay?

Which leads me to the next thing; the controversial opinions. Welp, sorry pal but those are staying. The bible is the bible is the bible is the bible, as I like to say,(…in my head)These are all good chats that your christian would probably love to have with you but are too scared (As you can probably understand why). Listen to what they have to say, you’ll probably disagree. Is this a fun and easy conversation starter? No but it’s a good conversation and you’ll never understand if you don’t talk so let’s keep it civilised. Will you change their mind? probably not. Will they change yours? Let us know how it goes. 

This is all not to say that the Christian community condemns you. We can condemn no one.

I know some people have unfortunately led with hate rather than with love which have given the impressions that Christians hate, we do not. We might not support the decisions made but you will not be shunned or treated like an outsider. You’ll learn soon, if you stick around long enough that Christian and controversy sometimes are hand in hand.

Jesus said some controversial things too back in the day. 

Does your Christian make you feel judged? useless? do you feel like they are treating you with contempt? disgust? or just being plain horrid? I think that’s a point to raise with them. We are not perfect people and sometimes it might feel like we are being judgemental but we really really really don’t want to do that, we honestly just want to help. Bring it up with them, talk about it and whenever you feel like they’re doing that, let them know.

Now let’s talk about this glow, the Godly glow. You know the one I’m talking about. That light? How does your Christian just seem so calm and even when they’re freaking out, they still seem kinda calm? Even when you absolutely dig into them with the toughest religious question you could probably think of to trip them up, they still seem kinda unscathed? That’s some real in the flesh God Glow baby. God scrubs us up so good on the inside that it actually starts showing on the outside, it’s almost the opposite of what the world teaches, scrub up on the outside and you’ll feel good on the inside. Pretty cool stuff ya feel?

The creation stuff, honestly man, I don’t know. I do not know. And yeah, your Christian may not have the answers all the time to your questions, and if they’re honest, which they should be, they should be able to say that.

I don’t know. All I know is that God said he created the earth and honestly, Imma believe it.

And before you write me off for just “believing blindly”. Think about all the things you’ve believed for granted. Maybe the belief that God doesn’t exist? You say science, but has science actually shown that God doesn’t exist or do you just believe that it has? Have you got the proof? Evolution. Have you read about the experiments? Do you actually know what you think you know, or do you just believe it cause everyone else does? 

Right now that we’ve successfully thrown you into an existential crisis, I suppose we can now conclude?

I think what your big take-away from this should be is that your Christian loves you and the God that your Christian believes in, loves you the most. You think your parents love you? Dude, Jesus literally died for you. Like he literally died. He died so that you wouldn’t have to. He died so that wrongdoings could be forgiven and forgotten, so that guilt can be taken away and so that peace can be brought to you.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.- John 14:27

We just want you to know that, so you can now actually start really living the best life you’ve been called to live.

Oh, there I am talking about God again.

Man, us Christians can’t stop, now can we?

Hm..but then again, How could we?

Lots of love,

Gedo xx