How are you? I know I haven’t written on this blog in what feels like a while, but I have just been really busy lately. I am going back to University very soon (yupp, summer came and went so quickly) so I’ve been preparing for that.
I know a lot of people, like me, will be preparing for University so I thought I would make a guide to make your moving in as easy and as stress free as possible.
- You don’t need half of what you’re taking.
When I moved into halls during first year, I definitely took a lot of things, games, bits and bobs, decoration pieces that I felt were cute but in retrospect, all they did was take space and collect dust. Try to pack minimally, there is nothing wrong with a few decorative pieces here and there to make your room feel homely but do you really need two rugs?
2. You don’t need to take all your clothes.
The closet space at University tends to be smaller than what you’re used to and there is a big likelihood you’ll buy more things whilst you are there so don’t take all of your clothes with you no matter how tempted you are to do so, I would suggest taking 1/3 of your current closet.
3. Remember that this isn’t your forever home.
Remember that you will be packing up all your stuff again at the end of (1st year) so don’t fill it up with big furniture and big plants because you will have to pack it all away again and you do not need that extra hassle, trust me.
4. Keep the boxes.
I know this isn’t the most aesthetically pleasing suggestion but try to keep some of the boxes you used perhaps under your bed or on top of your closet so that when you move out again at the end of the year, you don’t need to scramble around looking for where to pack your stuff into.
5. Make lists and then make them again.
People always says this, but it is so important to make lists and then make them again! I say make them again because you might forget some things and if you revise your list again you might find some things you don’t need.
I hope this has helped you even if it’s just a little bit!
Make sure to check my youtube channel (theshenarrative) because I will be posting a lot more University content on there!
Have a blessed weekend,
Lots of love,
How are you all doing??
I know, I know, I know, and like the prodigal son I return but I promise you I haven’t been spending your money on girls and gambling and alcohol (atleast I don’t think I have), it’s just that when you slip off the rock, even just a little, you become too lazy to climb it again, that has been what has been happening to me, even with my youtube I’ve been slipping a little but it has given me some time to think.
I’ve been thinking about friendships and how it works and I’ve come to realise how strong yet inherently weak a connection can be, hear me out. At the end of the day, you are dispensable and dispense-able.
This is primarily for the people who are currently in a toxic relationship or have currently been broken up with and feel like they can’t move on or like they will never be able to find a connection like the one they just lost/about to lose.
Listen babe, there are 7 billion people in the world, you could speak to thousands of people every single day and still not speak to everyone in the world. There will always be someone else who can give you the same connection, maybe even better, it’s just down to you finding each other, say you don’t want to leave because you’ve known each other for years, you will find someone else who can give you that time back. When you think about relationships from that perspective, it leaves you with a sense of ambivalence, you’re happy because it means that you can leave that toxic relationship with the knowledge that there is something out there better for you however it leaves a sense of sadness and dread because it means that you are dispensable.
I think the reason why a lot of people find it hard letting go is because they focus on the other person, they make that person their world and forget that there is a whole world out there and that’s a good thing when the relationship is a stable and healthy but once it turns toxic it seems as though we are stuck in that mindset, completely stuck in their world, it’s in those times that we need to broaden our scope and remember that there is a whole world out there, we just need to look up and see it.
I have a lot in the works guys and I’m really going to try and conquer my self-sabotaging self (something else I’m going to talk about) so I can feel get myself where I should be.
Thank you for reading.
Have a blessed weekend,
Lots of love,
How are you? I’m supposed to be completing my business notes right now but instead, I’m by the window in the library writing this #iluvuni.
Anyhow, I feel like I haven’t done a GGTG segment in a while but that’s because, just like you, I’m still on this walk with God and I still don’t really know what I’m doing (lol). Sometimes I feel like I know some stuff and sometimes, I feel like I know nothing and these days I’ve been feeling like I know nothing. I’m not perfect and neither is my relationship with God, which is what brings us into our topic for today.
I feel like a lot of people see Christians as beings that are incapable of feeling anything that is not synonymous with good (I wish it were true, I really do) but fortunately or unfortunately, that is not the case. They see Christians as these people that don’t face disappointment or confusion or even depression and anxiety, all we do is quote bible verses (please, I wish I could quote bible verses whenever I wanted to) and attack and judge anyone else who is not Christian (false yet again, we’re actually nice people pls)
If you’re reading this and going through something, I don’t expect you to read this and be healed or feel better, I just want to assure you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, even if you can’t see it yet.
Anxiety according to Google dictionary is defined as a feeling of worry, nervousness or unease about something with an uncertain outcome, another definition is a nervous disorder marked by excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks. GAD, according to NHS, Generalised Anxiety Disorder is a common condition that is estimated to affect up to 5% of the UK population which doesn’t sound like a lot until you realize that GAD is only one type of anxiety disorder.
If anxiety or anything at all is physically stopping you from living your life, physically stopping you from performing tasks and LIVING please, please, please get help, it does not make you weak, it does not make you a bad christian, please get the help you need.
What does the bible say about it?
God loves us. Say it with me.
God. Loves. Me.
God loves us, and the last thing he wants to see us is in pain, the last thing he wants to see us do is suffer and go through rough times and be anxious and depressed, and honestly his heart breaks for us when he sees us sad, just like your heart breaks when you see your mother or father or siblings or someone really close to you depressed.
1 Peter 5: 6 says “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” and then in Matthew 11:28, it states “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest”. He understands that we all go through these rough times and he does not blame you for that, he genuinely just wants to take all the hurt away.
The problem is sometimes we’re so deep in our sorrow, like even when we try to push our head up against the water, the devil pushes our head right back into it again (which is why, when you first feel yourself going down that hole, you get out of it because the more you sink, the more you’re stuck)
In Matthew 6:26, the bible states “Look at the birds of the air, they do not sew or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” and it’s so encouraging because it reassures that everything is going to be alright eventually because if God takes care of the birds and the wild flowers, things that can be considered insignificant, he definitely has our back, I mean, this is the same God that sent his son, Jesus to die for you, he’s got this, this message is so important that it’s in the bible twice, there is an identical passage to this one in Luke 12: 24. In fact, Romans 8:38 to 39 even says “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our lord”. Not even your anxiety or your depression can separate you from God’s love, no matter what it tries to tell you, whether it be that he’s not listening, or that he doesn’t love you or that you’re not a good christian or that you’re not doing enough, he still loves you.
What do I do then?
- Go to church
I know it sounds like such a typical thing to say but I am serious. Going to church when you feel anxious is such a great thing, being in the house of God brings about some sort of comfort and there you can just lay all your worries and your sorrows and whatever it is that is weighing you down on the cross. My cousin once told me the story of a girl who got broken up with and used going to church as a way to cry without people judging her and it actually ended up helping her relationship with God. Now, I’m not saying you should go to church when you need a good cry but it is one of the first places you should go with a heavy heart because it is the Lord’s house. Where did Hannah go when she had a very heavy heart in the bible? She traveled to church and there she let down the troubles of her heart out so well that the priest there, who had probably seen so many people pray, thought she was drunk and what does the bible say at the end? “Then she went away and ate something and her face was no longer downcast” (1 Samuel 1:18). So go to church,get something to eat and let your face not be downcast. You might not get the answer you’re looking for but you will find comfort, and peace and people who you can confide in and can pray for you.
2. Get someone to pray for/with you.
Whenever I get sad, I find it a little bit difficult to pray and sometimes getting someone to pray for and with you can be so beneficial. Matthew 18: 19-20 says “Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am among them.” and James 5:14-15 says “is any amongst you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven”. It’s okay to ask for support, that’s what we are here for. If you don’t have someone to pray for or with you, feel free to message me anytime.
3. Listen to gospel.
Another typical thing to say but it does help. I recommend songs like “Live!” by Tye Tribbett, “Take me to the King” by Tamela Mann and Kirk Franklin and my favourite right now, “Road trip” by Kirk Franklin, that one always manages to put me in a good mood, also “Rescuer” by Rend Collective (issajam) but yes, I get it, sometimes you’re really just not up for it but putting on those gospel tunes really does help with the calm, comfort and peace.
When I get into times of need, I also try my best to watch preaching about God’s love for me, and faith and hope and just things that are really encouraging. Most importantly, pray, prayer is so important, even though it’s just a couple words, let God know, ask for help. He wants to help you just as much as you want to be helped. And if you feel like he’s not listening, he is, just not in the way that you think he is. Christianity can be difficult sometimes especially in times like this, because you don’t get the direct answer or the direct feeling of being better, sometimes you have to wait. Ibuprofen and pain reliefs don’t work instantaneously, they take about 30 minutes before they start kicking in.
Listen to me darling, times like these are one of the times where it feels difficult to be a christian but these are also the times where you have to hold on to God the most, I promise you and I don’t promise a lot, but I promise you, hang on to God baby, you are going to make it.
It is going to be okay.
Have a blessed week,
Lots of love,
Also here’s some more encouraging bible verses for ya..
Proverbs 3: 5-6
Proverbs 12:25 (such a cute one this one)
1 Peters 5:6-8 (Important! do read)
Hebrews 13:5-6 (if material things are worrying you/people are scaring you)
Psalm 56:3 (A prayer to God)
What’s up? How is your week going?
Mine has been pretty good, we thank God. The month is almost ending, like omg where is this year going? There is literally 5 more days till the month of July goes, and then we’ll be in August and then September and then I’ll be 19 and then we’ll be in 2018? Wow, I’m excited though, 2017 let’s go!
Anyway, I want to talk about something that I realized and since then I seem to see it everywhere and that’s this lowkey hatred for everything that the internet is hyping. Everything that we think is great, in reality kinda sucks. Let me show you.
Let’s take being petty for example, according to the internet; Petty is this “trendy” term and anyone who is being petty is immediately funny or cool or even goals. Girls, especially will be the first to call themselves petty, you’ll find “petty queens” and etc.
Shows of pettiness go viral instantly. When people are being “petty”, they are congratulated like as if they are doing something good but according to dictionary.com petty is defined as “mean and ungenerous in small or trifling issues”, Urban dictionary’s definition of petty isn’t nice either; it’s defined as “making things, events, or actions normal people dismiss as trivial or insignificant into excuses to be upset, uncooperative, childish, or stubborn”. Imagine? All this time that your friends have been calling you petty queen they’ve been insulting you.
I’m not trying to ruin anyone’s fun or anything (Lol I don’t care) but what happened to forgiveness? Why are people so afraid to forgive now? People are so afraid of being humans now because they feel like as if doing anything kind or nice or normal will be regarded as soft or look as though they are being walked over. Everyone wants to be “strong” but it’s like they’ve forgotten what being strong actually means.
Now everyone is seeking revenge, have we forgotten that it’s not our place to punish? Don’t you know that it takes a great person, a strong person to forgive?
Let’s take another term, Finesse, this is definitely girls’ favorite one.
According to the internet, Finessing is what strong, sexy, smart, clever people do to get what they want. Sounds cool doesn’t it? Now let’s see what google dictionary (idk that dictionary that comes up when you google a definition) has to say about it, Finesse is “great subtlety and tact in handling or manipulating people or difficult situations”. Whilst Urban dictionary defines it as “persuading someone out of their belongings, or to do you a favor”. Sis, I’m sorry but if you’re a finesser then you’re just a glorified thief and dream seller. I don’t completely have an issue with finessing, like for example convincing your parents to get you pizza (without any corruption), I am completely for that but my problem with finesse is why it’s become viral; which is because people literally steal and are then proud of themselves. People who go on dates with people they have 0 interest in and want nothing to do with just to get a free meal (You will now be shouting MenareScum) or keeping a person around because you know they’ll splash money on you? (You will now be saying Women are the downfall of man).
Please wake up, don’t celebrate that kind of finessing.
the #MenareScum (okay I’m raising my hands up, I say this sometimes but as a joke I’m going to try and stop, I’m sorry) I’m just so over that hashtag, men are not scum bruh. Sorry but I literally need to ask, is your father scum? I didn’t think so.
I agree, there are some really, really, really, really whack minded men out there but that doesn’t mean we should categorize all men as scum. Let’s not be blinded, the hashtag just gives us a blanket where we can all just lie under and hate guys. I know a lot of people say, no that’s not true, we’re just talking about the ones that actually but let’s think about it for a second.
You’re scrolling on twitter or Instagram, maybe even Facebook, you’ll see something about MenareScum once, or someone will say it, maybe you even start saying you continue to see and say such everyday or almost everyday. It’s all fun and games till you repeat it so many times that you actually start believing it and one day wake up and realize you have an in depth hate for men and you don’t know how it started, then you’re in my office talking to me about how your relationships just aren’t working out for you and you don’t trust men and you think you might be lesbian which just isn’t the case.
See how easy it is to be misled?
Not all men are scum okay? I’m tired.
Another example of this repetition situation is the idea that women are the downfall of man, how many times have you watched a movie were the woman is the distraction or used as a distraction? Ever since Eve handed Adam that apple at the beginning, we just haven’t heard the end of it, giving men an excuse not to have real and good relationships. Do you know how many girls are out there in the “talking” stage because the guy believes she will be a distraction?
Do you want your children to grow up hating men?
Another one, is the whole “Me and my 8 boyfriends” thing that just seems to be annoyingly everywhere (again, may or may not have joked about this sometimes, but that was before I deeped all of this okay? I’ve stopped, I am a changed woman). So cheating is the new rave isn’t it? And guys, what’s this cheating thing that my ear just can’t stop hearing? It’s like all I’m hearing is how someone cheated on another person.
What is so funny about not being able to commit? Why are we condoning such behavior?
Why have we started treating things that are wrong as trivial matters? Have we just all lost our moral compasses?
So basically what does this all come down to?
Can we kill the year of the savage and change it into something that is actually cool? Like the year of self betterment?
Okay, well I hope you all have a great day/night and do something nice for someone. Let’s not be shouting spread love but be sharing things that undertone hate mmkay?
Have a blessed day,
Lots of love,
LOL it has been a very long time, or it feels like it. Happy month of July, I pray the month of July brings a lot of great things for all of you, I have a really good feeling about this month so I am very excited, very exciting things to come so definitely watch this space.
Anyway though, so yesterday, July 6th was a very big moment for a group of people (a people that I have come to relate to), yesterday was IB results day.
For those that don’t know, the IB stands for international Baccalaureate (I spent 2 years doing it and I still dont know how to spell it) and according to the website, it is is a non-profit educational foundation offering four highly respected programmes of international education that develop the intellectual, personal, emotional and social skills needed to live, learn and work in a rapidly globalizing world (IB). Every student knows that anything defined in less than 2 lines is going to be a problem so brace yourself.
There are 4 main parts of the IB programme;
Courses: You have to take 6 2 year courses, atleast 3 of them must be at higher level and with each course you must write an internal assessment, which is like a research paper except your language courses (Spanish, German, English, Yoruba etc) where you write a WA (written assessment). Your WAs get marked by teachers picked by the IB programme whilst your IAs get marked by your actual teachers (which is why they are called Internal Assessments)
TOK: TOK is a 1 year course, it stands for Theory of knowledge (tbh I don’t even know how to explain this subject, let’s just say you talk a lot about a lot of deep stuff that you don’t even care to know unless you care to know) at the end of this course, you have to write your TOK essay
As if you didn’t have enough on your plate there’s still
CAS: Creative, active and Service hours. You have to complete 50 hours of supervised activities under those three categories (not as easy as it sounds), at the end of each activity you have to write a report about it, including what you learn’t from it (and if you didn’t learn anything, you better know how to create something out of nothing, but that’s okay, it’s a skill you’ll learn after the 2 years)
EE: Your extended essay is a 4000 word essay you have to write under a course (any of the 6 courses you’re taking, during my time, it had to be out of your Higher levels but they’ve changed it now)
Ofcourse, there are also tests, quizzes, essays and all that basic stuff you do in class, we had to do that and then these 4 parts so the IB definitely was not for the faint-hearted.
Whilst I was doing the IB, the best part of my day was going to bed because that was the only time I wasn’t worrying about anything. I really didn’t enjoy it, I didn’t hate my school, I didn’t hate my teachers (I actually loved them), I didn’t hate my peers (they were tolerable, lol jk love you guys) but I really disliked doing the IB programme.
Do I regret doing it? I don’t think so, but that’s because I had a great support system (I am blessed to have a family that didn’t add any extra pressure to the pressure I was already putting on myself), I had great friends and understanding teachers so I don’t regret it but if you took away all of that then I think I would have regretted doing it.
Would I recommend it? Depending on the person, if you are a strong person or someone that enjoys challenges or you have a great support system or blessed intellectually then I think definitely go for it but if you are none of the above then don’t do it, it’s a lot of work and a lot of pressure.
Results day was probably one of the worst days of my life, I was so stressed and worried, I couldn’t sleep, my stomach was hurting and I kept using the bathroom every 5 minutes.
When I saw my results, I was shaking, I was so disappointed and maybe heartbroken, my parents had guests that day so when I saw my grades, I went and showed them then I went back into my room literally screaming and crying that I wasn’t going to University, I cried the entire day (thinking back at it now, I roll my eyes, I know I am dramatic but come on Gedo) I got a 29 by the way, I was predicted a 31, so I was 2 points lower than my predictions, although for a lot of them I was 1 point lower from crossing the grade boundary so if I got them remarked and gotten those points I could have gotten a 32 (which isnt a 45 but LOL)
I was so disappointed in my results, I couldn’t even tell people because I felt so ashamed of myself. After calls and preparing myself for clearing, I actually got into Uni with those results, and I ended up not going into clearing.
A year later, with my 29 and a lot of help from God, I have been accepted to schools in Germany, Canada and the UK (I tried again).
Basically what I am trying to say is, at the end of the day, your result is your result, a reflection of how you did at that point in your life not a reflection of yourself. Yes, you got grades you didn’t expect or want but honey it’s not the end of the world, life still goes on and you will go on with it.
I am happy I pushed through and did the IB, I am happy that I have a diploma with my name on it and I am overjoyed it is over.
So no worries my g, you got this.
Lots of love,
How has your week been? Mine has been pretty decent, I’ve just been working.
However on some exciting news we are in the month of May, fast approaching the month of June which means prom and graduation season!
All my babies are growing up.
Some people literally dream about this moment, they live for the whole celebration and everything whilst some people absolutely hate it, they think it’s too much fuss but there is something that both groups can agree on and that is, searching for the perfect dress can be stressful, even when you do know what you’re looking for. Never fear though, Gedo your fairy godmother is here to give you a few tips to help you get that Cinderella moment.
To make your journey easier, I would think decide on your colour palette before you get there. Decide on the colours you want or the get an idea of what colour you want your dress to be so that when it is time to look for your dress, you can focus on the colours you have picked, this way it makes the dress picking process less overwhelming and it slims down your options.
2. Avoid going online
Do not shop for your dress online, this is because shopping online can be so unnerving because you can’t be sure if it’s going to get to you on time, or if it will fit you the way it looks in the pictures or if it will even look the way it looks like in the pictures. Don’t get me wrong, online shopping is really great but it’s not great when it’s for something like a prom dress.
3. Go thrift shopping
Alright, hear me out first.
There is this myth about your prom dress having to be expensive, like it’s only good if it’s expensive which is completely wrong. You can find such beautiful, unique dresses at thrift stores for such wonderful prizes. Some of the dresses sold there haven’t ever been worn, or have been worn once. Just going into a thrift store, you’ll know you’re going to get something unique.
4. Design your own dress
Partner with a local tailor and design your own dress. I did this last year and I am so glad that I did. Designing your own dress gives you the freedom to pretty much do what you want (depending on how good your tailor is), not only that, the dress becomes more special to you making prom even more special for you because you’ll remember it as that prom you designed your own dress AND whenever you see the dress, you’ll be filled with pride because you designed it yourself.
5. Purchase your dress in a different town
This might seem a bit extra but this is for the people who are really scared that they might end up in the same dress as someone else. Basically every one will probably be looking in the same shops as you are because they are in the same town as you but by buying your dress in a different town you’d be opening yourself to different shops. Try not to go to the same shops as the ones you have in your town though because they will most likely have the same stock in their different outlets.
6. Your dream dress doesn’t have to be a dress
Another myth is that you have to wear a dress to prom, which again is wrong. There are no rules to prom dressing, if you want to wear a suit, a skirt, girl you better work.
Wear what makes you look good and what makes you feel comfortable.
I hope these tips help you find your dream dress and I also hope you have the best time at prom, and remember girl you do NOT need a prom date to have a lit time.
Don’t do anything Jesus won’t like 😉
Have a blessed week,
Lots of love,
I have decided that I am going to change “Geespeaks” to “Honestly tho” because I think it sounds nicer, not to mention that’s basically what I say when I am about to spill some real juice.
So I wanna talk about this because it lowkeys pisses a b off (this is very un-blog-professional but I don’t care, this is my blog, I do what I want) so it annoys me and it’s something that I have noticed especially here in Nigeria and that is;
how unfriendly women are to their fellow women.
It annoys me so much because as women we basically owe it to ourselves to be nice to each other, how can we be going through the same struggle, we are both hustling yet you can’t even help me open the door when you see my hands are full?
Why do we need to be so horrible to each other? stab each other in the back, judge unnecessarily, we’ll easily throw an insult before going to compliment a fellow girl and it really should not be so. The world is already so unfair to us, judging our every move, why should we be unfair to each other as well?
Why can’t we be as nice to each other as we are to the guys who don’t even think about us? Imagine a world where a guy cheats and we side with each other instead of blaming the girl for not being able to keep her man? Imagine not even celebrating the ability to take another girl’s man? Imagine removing the focus on the guy in general and instead focusing on the powerful woman? Imagine not looking at another woman’s beauty as the absence of your own? Imagine bathroom talk but everywhere?
I know it’s hard because sometimes you don’t even know when the disapproving hiss comes out but for every disapproving hiss there should be three heartfelt compliments.
I just want to be able to trust all of you girls and for us to glow together. I just want any of us to be able to walk into any room and feel empowered, we don’t even need to say anything, just that smile is all I need and we all know the smile I am talking about.
Honestly tho I really admire females, from baby girls to women because we have such a strength and beauty both on the inside and on the outside of us and I just want us to bind together; I just want women to be for women.
Have a lovely week,
disclaimer: the picture in the featured image is not mine, source link below.
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